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Everyone has a little Big Lebowski in them. This quiz is designed to reveal your inner Lebowski...

Created a long time ago...but updated 7-10-05



You wake up in the morning and get dressed. What do you put on?

Bathrobe and some flip-flops.
Something simple...some shorts, maybe a combat jacket.
Jumpsuits...but not orange. I like purple. And some press on nails.
A bowling shirt.
Black Leather...and a lot of it.
Cowboy boots and a big ol' hat.
A bikini - or nothing.
Fur.
A suit and tie.
Not a dress...ever...


Which of the following sounds most like something you'd say?

screeeeeeeeeech!
uh, uh, um, uh, uh
Fuck it, dude.
You've got a date Wednesday baby!
Sometimes you eat the bar, sometimes the bar eats you.
I'll suck your cock for a thousand dollars.
The God damn plane has crashed in to the mountain!
Vagina.
I'm the walrus.
I believe in nothing.


You're decorating a room. What do you put in it?

Newspaper.
The key to the city I live in.
My dirty undies.
Bars over the windows.
Nothing.
A bed. and a camera.
Art, and my old records.
A rug, to tie the room together.
A bowling lane.
Relics of the old west.



What do you think about sex?

The younger, the better...
You mean coitus?
My girlfriend doesn't turn me on since she cut her toe off.
Only if we're the same species.
I like it. I like it even more when I get paid.
It's a zesty little enterprise...
Have you seen my wife? hell yes!
There was this hooker once...
Can't fuck....bowling.
Well, that's quite a subject...


What's your biggest concern?

Respect for veterans!
Showin' the Money.
A strike on my next frame.
Getting fed...
Telling it like it is.
Getting caught within 300 yards of children.
Having fun, and having sex.
Conception and motherhood. And art.
Nothing.
Surviving day to day.



Do you have a lot of friends?

Who needs friends when you've got servants?
Everyone except Charlie. And people who don't follow the rules.
I'm a stranger to everyone.
A couple, but I don't care.
A few, mostly video artists.
Just my co-star in the beaver picture.
They're more keepers than friends.
Yeah...man.
I have bowling buddies.
Just the people I met when I had to go door to door when I moved here...


If you had a pet, what would it be?

A horse.
Something that likes kids.
A marmot.
I don't have pets...I have enough trouble taking care of myself.
A man...
Keeping pets is wrong.
A lizard...it's cold blooded.
A dog.
A bowling ball.
Are you crazy? I'm a busy person!



Whats your claim to fame?

That video I made....*wink*
I'm a veteran.
My art....
My neat country-western outfit!
Bowling.
Have you heard of the Seattle Seven?
My band.
Spending 6 months in prison.
There was this one time in a bathtub...
I'm rich...and I have the key to the city! Poop on you!




Which do you find most enjoyable?

Ridin' around on horseback.
Creating art stuff.
"Volunteering" at the elementary school.
Gettin' high and listening to Creedence.
Going for a walk and a swim.
Cutting off my girlfriend's toe.
Thinking about my ex...but I'm over it...really...
Sex...
Waving my money around.
Going bowling.



Do you like to bowl?

Nah, I'm more in to setting cars on fire.
Sure, just not on Saturday.
You mean like in that movie "Gutterballs"?
I find it difficult to bowl without arms.
Yeah, bowl and drink.
Sometimes, but the shoes don't go with my dress.
Yeah...and I'm the best at it. Ha!
Bowling alleys are dreadful places...
I go to the lanes just for the Sarsaparilla.
I find it difficult to bowl without legs.



What do you hate the most?

Anyone who would pee on a rug.
People who cuss to much.
Johnsons.
Having a girlfriend with just nine toes.
Being out of my element.
Bums.
Introducing myself when I move to a new neighborhood.
Men who are afraid of the female form.
Monogamy.
People who break the rules.